News
Youth baseball coach attacks parent with aluminum bat, probably shouldn't coach youth baseball anymore
One of the biggest fallacies here on planet earth is that you should always respect your elders. Respect is earned, not given, and you don't get brownie points simply for not dying. As it turns out, plenty of terrible people are old, like Cincinnati Flames youth baseball coach Paul Melvin who, despite being the "elder" of the 13U baseball team he was coaching in Indianapolis this weekend, was in fact the worst behaved human in attendance, attempting to attack a parent with one of his players' aluminum bats in what looks like the most milquetoast Grand Theft Auto mod of all time. Let rage blackout commence.
Now we don't know what provoked this outburst or what Melvin would have actually done if he were able to reach his target without first being restrained, but let's just keep this simple: You aren't allowed to hit people with baseball bats. You aren't allowed to threaten to hit people with baseball bats. You're especially not allowed to hit or threaten to hit people with baseball bats when you're the chaperone and primary male role model for a bunch of teenage boys, who, let's be honest, haven't been exactly been blossoming into fine, upstanding young men of late.
So try yoga, switch to decaf, move to Montana and live off the land for a few years. Do whatever you gotta do, but if you're gonna give yourself an early onset aneurysm, at least save it for something that actually matters, like hitting it into the water on twelve or something.