DeMarcus Cousins explaining the plot of 'Titanic' is inexplicably hilarious

Never judge a book by its cover nor a NBA bad boy by his taste in film. Just ask DeMarcus Cousins, who took time out of his busy triple-double schedule on Wednesday evening to give America a quick refresher on the 1997 super-uber-mega-smash hit Titanic, which seems to be a pretty new discovery for the world of pro athletics. Suffice to say, if you're looking for a laugh (or another couple seconds spent in the loving embrace of Jack n' Rose), give this one a look:

Now Boogie has never been known to shy away from locker room controversy or an elbow-throwing battle in the paint, but he shows his softer side here, getting wrapped up in the torrid, socio-economic-staus-shattering love affair of our time. All this Rose bashing has gotta go, however.

Cousins, like seemingly everyone else on earth, gets on her case for the damn door-sharing thing again, when they know damn well they wouldn't spare a single square inch of mahogany if it meant having to dip their fresh pedi in the sub-zero depths of the North Atlantic. We all watched the "can't spare a square" episode of Seinfeld, folks. In matters of life, death, and toilet paper, it's every man and woman for themselves.