Goodness gracious football can't come soon enough. Partly because football is fun and we like football, but mostly for the sake of the players, whose brains turn to oatmeal when unplugged from the ol' pigskin for too long. Jalen Richard is bragging about his kids being unvaccinated, Tom Brady is exploring the philosophies of Thanos, and Odell Beckham Jr. attended the ESPYs dressed like a SoHo kangaroo. None, however, have displayed warning signs quite like Colts backup quarterback Jacoby Brissett, who took to Twitter on Thursday to ponder some of life's most unponderable questions. Namely, is the sun actually hot?
Apparently Flat Earth trutherism is soooo 2017, and humanity has moved on to more cosmic concerns, such as if the sun were real, why wouldn't the whole universe be a toaster oven? The answer, as it turns out, was right under Jacoby's nose thanks to this little thing called science. Who knew!
Clearly Jacoby could use an invite to Andrew Luck's book club for the 2019 season. On the plus side, though, at least this isn't as bad as Jordan Clarkson's theory that dinosaurs were once pets to an ancient race of giant humanoids. Nonetheless we hope Jacoby gets some meaningful reps come the Colts first preseason game versus the Bills on August 8th, not only for the sake of his career, but also his mind.
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